Strange Twist
by Swolio
Summary: Harry is in for a wild ride. What would happen if he took the dog from Magnolia Crescent with him on the Knight Bus and left the Dursley's earlier? Were about to find out. UNDERGOING REVISION! CHAPTER 1 & 2 ARE READY TO BE READ!
1. Escaping Privet Drive

Harry Potter and the Strange Twist

AN: REVAMPED CHAPTER!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, if I did why would I write a fan fiction? Also I know that most of it is straight from the book with a few parts tweaked to fit the time of the story but please bear with me and no flames I am going to stop using direct stuff from the book after this chapter I just need it to keep most of the plot the same. I shall make a small AN where it starts to change from the book majorly but if you read you can see I edited out some of the paragraphs and changed a few words to make it sound like he hadn't been there as long.

Chapter 1 – Escaping Privet Drive

Harry Potter was a highly unusual boy in many  
ways. For one thing, he hated the summer holidays more than any  
other time of year. For another, he really wanted to do his  
homework but was forced to do it in secret, in the dead of night.  
And he also happened to be a wizard.

It was nearly midnight, and he was lying on his stomach in bed, the blankets drawn right over his head like a tent, a flashlight in one hand and a large leather-bound book (_A History of Magic_ by Bathilda Bagshot) propped open against the pillow. Harry moved the tip of his eagle-feather quill down the page, frowning as he looked for something that would help him write his essay, "Witch Burning in the Fourteenth Century Was Completely Pointless discuss." The quill paused at the top of a likely-looking paragraph.

Harry pushed his round glasses up the bridge of his nose, moved his flashlight closer to the book, and read:

_Non-magic people (more commonly known as Muggles) were particularly afraid of magic in medieval times, but not very good at recognizing it. On the rare occasion that they did catch a real witch or wizard, burning had no effect whatsoever. The witch or wizard would perform a basic Flame Freezing Charm and then pretend to shriek with pain while enjoying a gentle, tickling sensation. Indeed, Wendelin the Weird enjoyed being burned so much that she allowed herself to be caught no less than forty-seven times in various disguises._

Harry put his quill between his teeth and reached underneath his pillow for his inkbottle and a roll of parchment. Slowly and very carefully he unscrewed the ink bottle, dipped his quill into it, and began to write, pausing every now and then to listen, because if any of the Dursleys heard the scratching of his quill on their way to the bathroom, he'd probably find himself locked in the cupboard under the stairs for the rest of the summer.

The Dursley family of Number Four, Privet Drive, was the reason that Harry never enjoyed his summer holidays. Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and their son, Dudley, were Harry's only living relatives. They were Muggles, and they had a very medieval attitude toward magic. Harry's dead parents, who had been a witch and wizard themselves, were never mentioned under the Dursleys' roof. For years, Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon had hoped that if they kept Harry as downtrodden as possible, they would be able to squash the magic out of him. To their fury, they had not been unsuccessful. These days they lived in terror of anyone finding out that Harry had spent most of the last two years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The most they could do, however, was to lock away Harry's spell books, wand, cauldron, and broomstick at the start of the summer break, and forbid him to talk to the neighbors.

This separation from his spell books had been a real problem for Harry, because his teachers at Hogwarts had given him a lot of holiday work. One of the essays, a particularly nasty one about Shrinking Potions, was for Harry's least favorite teacher, Professor Snape, who would be delighted to have an excuse to give Harry detention for a month. Harry had therefore seized his chance on the very next day. While Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and Dudley had gone out into the front garden to admire Uncle Vernon's new company car (in very loud voices, so that the rest of the street would notice it too), Harry had crept downstairs, picked the lock on the cupboard under the stairs,grabbed some of his books, and hidden them in his bedroom. As long as he didn't leave spots of ink on the sheets, the Dursleys need never know that he was studying magic by night.

Harry finished writing about Wendelin the Weird and paused to listen again. The silence in the dark house was broken only by the distant, grunting snores of his enormous cousin, Dudley. It must be very late, Harry thought. His eyes were itching with tiredness. Perhaps he'd finish this essay tomorrow night…

He replaced the top of the ink bottle; pulled an old pillowcase from under his bed; put the flashlight, A History of Magic, his essay, quill, and ink inside it; got out of bed; and hid the lot under a loose floorboard under his bed. Then he stood up, stretched, and checked the time on the luminous alarm clock on his bedside table.

It was one o'clock in the morning. Stretching Harry walked over to the windowsill and propped himself up watching the stars twinkle in the late night sky.

Harry, though still rather small and skinny for his age, had grown a few inches over the last year. His jet-black hair, however, was just as it always had been, stubbornly untidy, whatever he did to it. The eyes behind his glasses were bright green, and on his forehead, clearly visible through his hair, was a thin scar, shaped like a bolt of lightning.

Of all the unusual things about Harry, this scar was the most extraordinary and unusual of all. It was not, as the Dursleys had pretended for ten years, a souvenir of the car crash that had killed Harry's parents, because Lily and James Potter had not died in a car crash. They had been murdered by the most feared Dark wizard for a hundred years, Lord Voldemort. Harry had escaped from the same attack with nothing more than a scar on his forehead, whereas Voldemort's curse, instead of killing him, had rebounded upon its caster. Barely alive, Voldemort had fled…

But Harry had come face-to-face with him at Hogwarts twice now. Remembering their last meeting as he stood at the dark window, Harry had to admit he was lucky even to have lived this long.

It was only three days into vacation but Harry was already wishing to be back in the wizarding world. Silently he went over to Hedwig's cage and stroked her feathers, for which she gave Harry a reassuring hoot. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was already two a.m. in the morning. Deciding to get a bit of sleep Harry walked over to his bed and collapsed onto it sleepily letting sleep overtake him.

****Scene Break****

Harry went down to breakfast the next morning to find the three Dursleys already sitting around the kitchen table. They were watching a brand-new television, a welcome-home-for-the-summer present for Dudley, who had been complaining loudly about the long walk between the fridge and the television in the living room. Dudley had spent most of the summer in the kitchen, his piggy little eyes fixed on the screen and his five chins wobbling as he ate continually.

Harry sat down between Dudley and Uncle Vernon, a large, beefy man with very little neck and a lot of mustache. None of the Dursleys made any sign that they had noticed Harry enter the room, but Harry was far too used to this to care. He helped himself to a piece of toast and then looked up at the reporter on the television, who was halfway through a report on an escaped convict.

"… The public is warned that Black is armed and extremely dangerous. A special hot line has been set up, and any sighting of Black should be reported immediately."

"No need to tell us he's no good," snorted Uncle Vernon, staring over the top of his newspaper at the prisoner. "Look at the state of him, the filthy lay about! Look at his hair!"

He shot a nasty look sideways at Harry, whose untidy hair had always been a source of great annoyance to Uncle Vernon. Compared to the man on the television, however, whose gaunt face was surrounded by a matted, elbow-length tangle, Harry felt very well groomed.

The reporter had reappeared. "The Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries will announce today —"

"Hang on!" barked Uncle Vernon, staring furiously at the reporter. "You didn't tell us where that maniac's escaped from! What use is that? Lunatic could be coming up the street right now!"

Aunt Petunia, who was bony and horse-faced, whipped around and peered intently out of the kitchen window. Harry knew Aunt Petunia would simply love to be the one to call the hot line number. She was the nosiest woman in the world and spent most of her life spying on the boring, law-abiding neighbors.

"When will they learn," said Uncle Vernon, pounding the table with his large purple fist, "that hanging's the only way to deal with these people?"

"Very true," said Aunt Petunia, who was still squinting into next door's runner-beans.

Uncle Vernon drained his teacup, glanced at his watch, and added, "I'd better be off in a minute, Petunia. Marge's train gets in at ten."

Harry, who had been thinking about a way to escape the Dursleys early, was brought back to earth with an unpleasant bump.

"Aunt Marge?" he blurted out. "Sh-she's not coming here, is she?"

Aunt Marge was Uncle Vernon's sister. Even though she was not a blood relative of Harry's (whose mother had been Aunt Petunia's sister), he had been forced to call her 'Aunt' all his life. Aunt Marge lived in the country, in a house with a large garden, where she bred bulldogs.

She didn't often stay at Privet Drive, because she couldn't bear to leave her precious dogs, but each of her visits stood out horribly vividly in Harry's mind.

At Dudley's fifth birthday party, Aunt Marge had whacked Harry around the shins with her walking stick to stop him from beating Dudley at musical statues. A few years later, she had turned up at Christmas with a computerized robot for Dudley and a box of dog biscuits for Harry.

On her last visit, the year before Harry started at Hogwarts, Harry had accidentally trodden on the tail of her favorite dog. Ripper had chased Harry out into the garden and up a tree, and Aunt Marge had refused to call him off until past midnight.

The memory of this incident still brought tears of laughter to Dudley's eyes.

"Marge will be here for a week," Uncle Vernon snarled, "and while we're on the subject," he pointed a fat finger threateningly at Harry, "we need to get a few things straight before I go and collect her."

Dudley smirked and withdrew his gaze from the television. Watching Harry being bullied by Uncle Vernon was Dudley's favorite form of entertainment.

"Firstly," growled Uncle Vernon, "you'll keep a civil tongue in your head when you're talking to Marge."

"All right," said Harry bitterly, "if she does when she's talking to me."

"Secondly," said Uncle Vernon, acting as though he had not heard Harry's reply, "as Marge doesn't know anything about your abnormality, I don't want any — any funny stuff while she's here. You behave yourself, got me?"

"I will if she does," said Harry through gritted teeth.

"And thirdly," said Uncle Vernon, his mean little eyes now slits in his great purple face, "we've told Marge you attend St. Brutus's Secure Center for Incurably Criminal Boys."

"What?" Harry yelled.

"And you'll be sticking to that story, boy, or there'll be trouble," spat Uncle Vernon.

Harry sat there, white-faced and furious, staring at Uncle Vernon, hardly able to believe it. Aunt Marge coming for a weeklong visit was positively horrendous.

"Well, Petunia," said Uncle Vernon, getting heavily to his feet, "I'll be off to the station, then. Want to come along for the ride, Dudders?"

"No," said Dudley, whose attention had returned to the television now that Uncle Vernon had finished threatening Harry.

"Duddy's got to make himself smart for his auntie," said Aunt Petunia, smoothing Dudley's thick blond hair. "Mummy's bought him a lovely new bow-tie."

Uncle Vernon clapped Dudley on his porky shoulder. "See you in a bit, then," he said, and he left the kitchen.

Harry sat in a kind of horrified trance for a bit before rushing up to his room. Slamming his door he grabbed last years transfigurations textbook and read a bit of it while he cooled off his steamed head. Sighing loudly Harry tossed the book onto the bed and went over to Hedwig. "Hey girl imam let you out for the week. There is no way I am going to let you stay here with that fat bitch here. Go find Ron or Hermione and stay with them for a week ok? You can come back as soon as the weeks over."

Hedwig's large amber eyes were reproachful. "I'm sorry girl but you have to go for me please?"

Hedwig hooted softly and nipped his ear affectionately before taking off out the open window. Sighing Harry went downstairs as he heard Uncle Vernon pull into the driveway. With a feeling of coming doom Harry stepped into the living room where everyone was sitting.

****Scene Break****

Harry got through the next three days by forcing himself to think about his Quidditch matches whenever Aunt Marge started on him. This worked quite well, though it seemed to give him a glazed look, because Aunt Marge started voicing the opinion that he was mentally subnormal.

That night, one week into vacation and the fourth day of Marge's stay, Aunt Petunia cooked a fancy dinner and Uncle Vernon uncorked several bottles of wine. They got all the way through the soup and the salmon without a single mention of Harry's faults; during the lemon meringue pie, Uncle Vernon bored them a with a long talk about Grunnings, his drill-making company; then Aunt Petunia made coffee and Uncle Vernon brought out a bottle of brandy.

"Can I tempt you, Marge?"

Aunt Marge had already had quite a lot of wine. Her huge face was very red. "Just a small one, then," she chuckled. "A bit more than that… and a bit more… that's the ticket."

Dudley was eating his fourth slice of pie. Aunt Petunia was sipping coffee with her little finger sticking out. Harry really wanted to disappear into his bedroom, but he met Uncle Vernon's angry little eyes and knew he would have to sit it out.

"Ah," said Aunt Marge, smacking her lips and putting the empty brandy glass back down. "Excellent nosh, Petunia. It's normally just a fry-up for me of an evening, with twelve dogs to look after…" She burped richly and patted her great tweed stomach. "Pardon me. But I do like to see a healthy-sized boy," she went on, winking at Dudley. "You'll be a proper-sized man, Dudders, like your father. Yes, I'll have a spot more brandy, Vernon…"

"Now, this one here —" She jerked her head at Harry, who felt his stomach clench. Quidditch, he thought quickly.

"This one's got a mean, runty look about him. You get that with dogs. I had Colonel Fubster drown one last year. Ratty little thing it was, weak, underbred."

Harry was trying to remember his first ever Quidditch match.

"It all comes down to blood, as I was saying the other day. Bad blood will out. Now, I'm saying nothing against your family, Petunia" — she patted Aunt Petunia's bony hand with her shovel-like one "but your sister was a bad egg. They turn up in the best families. Then she ran off with a wastrel and here's the result right in front of us."

Harry was staring at his plate, a funny ringing in his ears. 'I was circling the pitch watching Katie score a few goals', he thought. But he couldn't remember what came next. Aunt Marge's voice seemed to be boring into him like one of Uncle Vernon's drills.

"This Potter," said Aunt Marge loudly, seizing the brandy bottle and splashing more into her glass and over the tablecloth, "you never told me what he did?"

Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia were looking extremely tense. Dudley had even looked up from his pie to gape at his parents. "He — didn't work," said Uncle Vernon, with half a glance at Harry. "Unemployed."

"As I expected!" said Aunt Marge, taking a huge swig of brandy and wiping her chin on her sleeve. "A no-account, good-for-nothing, lazy scrounger who —"

"He was not," said Harry suddenly. The table went very quiet. Harry was shaking all over. He had never felt so angry in his life.

"MORE BRANDY!" yelled Uncle Vernon, who had gone very white. He emptied the bottle into Aunt Marge's glass. "You, boy," he snarled at Harry. "Go to bed, go on —"

"No, Vernon," hiccupped Aunt Marge, holding up a hand, her tiny bloodshot eyes fixed on Harry's. "Go on, boy, go on. Proud of your parents, are you? They go and get themselves killed in a car crash (drunk, I expect) —"

"They didn't die in a car crash!" said Harry, who found himself on his feet.

"They died in a car crash, you nasty little liar, and left you to be a burden on their decent, hardworking relatives!" screamed Aunt Marge, swelling with fury. "You are an insolent, ungrateful little —"

But Aunt Marge suddenly stopped speaking. For a moment, it looked as though words had failed her. She seemed to be swelling with inexpressible anger — but the swelling didn't stop.

Her great red face started to expand, her tiny eyes bulged, and her mouth stretched too tightly for speech — next second, several buttons had just burst from her tweed jacket and pinged off the walls — she was inflating like a monstrous balloon, her stomach bursting free of her tweed waistband, each of her fingers blowing up like a salami…

"MARGE!" yelled Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia together as Aunt Marge's whole body began to rise off her chair toward the ceiling. She was entirely round, now, like a vast life buoy with piggy eyes, and her hands and feet stuck out weirdly as she drifted up into the air, making apoplectic popping noises. Ripper came skidding into the room, barking madly.

"NOOOOOOO!"

Uncle Vernon seized one of Marge's feet and tried to pull her down again, but was almost lifted from the floor himself. A second later, Ripper leapt forward and sank his teeth into Uncle Vernon's leg.

Harry tore from the dining room before anyone could stop him, heading for the cupboard under the stairs. The cupboard door burst magically open as he reached it. In seconds, he had heaved his trunk to the front door. He sprinted upstairs and threw himself under the bed, wrenching up the loose floorboard, and grabbed the pillowcase full of his books. He wriggled out, seized Hedwig's empty cage, and dashed back downstairs to his trunk, just as Uncle Vernon burst out of the dining room, his trouser leg in bloody tatters.

"COME BACK IN HERE!" he bellowed. "COME BACK AND PUT HER RIGHT!"

But a reckless rage had come over Harry. He kicked his trunk open, pulled out his wand, and pointed it at Uncle Vernon. "She deserved it," Harry said, breathing very fast. "She deserved what she got. You keep away from me."

He fumbled behind him for the latch on the door. "I'm going," Harry said. "I've had enough."

And in the next moment, he was out in the dark, quiet street, heaving his heavy trunk behind him, Hedwig's cage under his arm.

****Scene Break****

Harry was several streets away before he collapsed onto a low wall in Magnolia Crescent, panting from the effort of dragging his trunk. He sat quite still, anger still surging through him, listening to the frantic thumping of his heart.

A funny prickling on the back of his neck had made Harry feel he was being watched, quickly looking around he saw that the street appeared to be deserted, and no lights shone from any of the large square houses.

He bent over his trunk, but almost immediately stood up, his hand clenched on his wand. He had sensed rather than heard it: someone or something was standing in the narrow gap between the garage and the fence behind him. Harry squinted at the black alleyway. If only it would move, then he'd know whether it was just a stray cat or — something else.

"Lumos," Harry muttered, and a light appeared at the end of his wand, almost dazzling him. He held it high over his head, and the pebble-dashed walls of number two suddenly sparkled; the garage door gleamed, and between them Harry saw, quite distinctly, the hulking outline of something very big, with wide, gleaming eyes.

Harry stepped backward. His legs hit his trunk and he tripped. His wand flew out of his hand as he flung out an arm to break his fall, and he landed, hard, in the gutter.

There was a deafening BANG, and Harry threw up his hands to shield his eyes against a sudden blinding light…

With a yell, he rolled back onto the pavement, just in time. A second later, a gigantic pair of wheels and headlights screeched to a halt exactly where Harry had just been lying.

They belonged, as Harry saw when he raised his head, to a triple-decker, violently purple bus, which had appeared out of thin air. Gold lettering over the windshield spelled The Knight Bus.

For a split second, Harry wondered if he had been knocked silly by his fall. Then a conductor in a purple uniform leapt out of the bus and began to speak loudly to the night.

"Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transport for the stranded witch or wizard just stick out your wand hand, step on board, and we can take you anywhere you want to go. My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor this eve—"

The conductor stopped abruptly. He had just caught sight of Harry, who was still sitting on the ground. Harry snatched up his wand again and scrambled to his feet. Close up, he saw that Stan Shunpike was only a few years older than he was, eighteen or nineteen at most, with large, protruding ears and quite a few pimples.

"What were you doin' down there?" said Stan, dropping his professional manner.

"Fell over," said Harry.

"'Choo fall over for?" sniggered Stan.

"I didn't do it on purpose," said Harry, annoyed. One of the knees in his jeans was torn, and the hand he had thrown out to break his fall was bleeding. He suddenly remembered why he had fallen over and turned around quickly to stare at the alleyway between the garage and fence. The Knight Bus's headlamps were flooding it with light, **(AN: here you go this is where it starts to change enjoy xP)** and standing there was a huge black dog.

"Blimey tha's one big dog. He yours?"

The dog, which had been looking at them interestedly, suddenly bounded over to Harry and licked him on the face. Harry thought it might have been a trick of the light but he could swear he saw a grin on the dog's face. Still a bit shocked Harry managed to say, though he had no idea why, "Yes I guess he is."

Stan, turned his attention away from the dog and said, "Right then I guess he can ride wif' you wherever your goin'."

The dog seemed to be thrilled by this idea and bounded onto the bus. Smiling slightly Harry climbed to his feet absentmindedly brushing the hair out of his eyes.

Stan's eyes move to the scar on Harry's forehead.

"Woss that on your 'ead?" said Stan abruptly.

"Nothing," said Harry quickly, flattening his hair over his scar.

"Woss your name again?" Stan persisted.

"Neville Longbottom," said Harry, saying the first name that came into his head.

"So — so this bus," he went on quickly, hoping to distract Stan, "did you say it goes anywhere?"

"Yep," said Stan proudly, "anywhere you like, 'long it's on land, can't do nuffink underwater.

"Good can you get me and my dog to London?"

"Sure thing. It'll be eleven sickles."

Rummaging in his trunk he grabbed his money bag and paid Stan before helping him lift his trunk onto the bus. It was filled with brass bedsteads. He quickly dumped his trunk under the one that the dog was sitting on. Putting Hedwig's cage down next to him, he sat back for the ride.

****Scene Break****

As Harry dragged his trunk off the bus he had only one thought, 'I am SO glad that that is over.' Dragging his trunk into the Leaky Cauldron Harry was met with the last thing he wanted to see after blowing his aunt up, Cornelius Fudge, the Minister of Magic.

As the dog nudged him from behind Harry walked forward and was greeted by the Minister. "Hello Harry."

"Hello sir," said Harry politely which got a small smile from Fudge. Just then a stooping figure came out from behind the bar, it was Tom, the wizened, toothless landlord.

"You've got him, Minister!" said Tom. "Will you want anything? Beer? Brandy?"

"Perhaps a pot of tea," said Fudge, "And a private parlor, please, Tom."

**(AN: this is the same chat from the book so if you're not a complete dunderhead and remember it you can skip this part)**

Fudge marched Harry along the narrow passage after Tom's lantern, and then into a small parlor. Tom clicked his fingers, a fire burst into life in the grate, and he bowed himself out of the room.

"Sit down, Harry," said Fudge, indicating a chair by the fire.

Harry sat down, feeling goose bumps rising up his arms despite the glow of the fire. Fudge took off his pinstriped cloak and tossed it aside, then hitched up the trousers of his bottle-green suit and sat down opposite Harry.

"I am Cornelius Fudge, Harry. The Minister of Magic."

Harry already knew this, of course; he had seen Fudge once before, but as he had been wearing his father's Invisibility Cloak at the time, Fudge wasn't to know that.

Tom the innkeeper reappeared, wearing an apron over his nightshirt and bearing a tray of tea and crumpets. He placed the tray on a table between Fudge and Harry and left the parlor, closing the door behind him.

"Well, Harry," said Fudge, pouring out tea, "you've had us all in a right flap, I don't mind telling you. Running away from your aunt and uncle's house like that! I'd started to think… but you're safe, and that's what matters." Fudge buttered himself a crumpet and pushed the plate toward Harry.

"Eat, Harry, you look dead on your feet. Now then… You will be pleased to hear that we have dealt with the unfortunate blowing-up of Miss Marjorie Dursley. Two members of the Accidental Magic Reversal Department were dispatched to Privet Drive a few hours ago. Miss Dursley has been punctured and her memory has been modified. She has no recollection of the incident at all. So that's that, and no harm done."

Fudge smiled at Harry over the rim of his teacup, rather like an uncle surveying a favorite nephew. Harry, who couldn't believe his ears, opened his mouth to speak, couldn't think of anything to say, and closed it again.

"Ah, you're worrying about the reaction of your aunt and uncle?" said Fudge. "Well, I won't deny that they are extremely angry, Harry, but they are prepared to take you back next summer as long as you stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas and Easter holidays."

Harry unstuck his throat. "I always stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas and Easter holidays," he said, "and I don't ever want to go back to Privet Drive."

"Now, now, I'm sure you'll feel differently once you've calmed down," said Fudge in a worried tone. "They are your family, after all, and I'm sure you are fond of each other — err — very deep down."

It didn't occur to Harry to put Fudge right. He was still waiting to hear what was going to happen to him now.

"So all that remains," said Fudge, now buttering himself a second crumpet, "is to decide where you're going to spend the last month and a half of your vacation. I suggest you take a room here at the Leaky Cauldron and…"

"Hang on," blurted Harry. "What about my punishment?"

Fudge blinked. "Punishment?"

"I broke the law!" Harry said. "The Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry!"

"Oh, my dear boy, we're not going to punish you for a little thing like that!" cried Fudge, waving his crumpet impatiently. "It was an accident! We don't send people to Azkaban just for blowing up their aunts!"

But this didn't tally at all with Harry's past dealings with the Ministry of Magic. "Last year, I got an official warning just because a house-elf smashed a pudding in my uncle's house!" he told Fudge, frowning. "The Ministry of Magic said I'd be expelled from Hogwarts if there was any more magic there!"

Unless Harry's eyes were deceiving him, Fudge was suddenly looking awkward. "Circumstances change, Harry… We have to take into account… in the present climate… Surely you don't want to be expelled?"

"Of course I don't," said Harry.

"Well then, what's all the fuss about?" laughed Fudge. "Now, have a crumpet, Harry, while I go and see if Tom's got a room for you."

Fudge strode out of the parlor and Harry stared after him. There was something extremely odd going on. Why had Fudge been waiting for him at the Leaky Cauldron, if not to punish him for what he'd done? And now Harry came to think of it, surely it wasn't usual for the Minister of Magic himself to get involved in matters of underage magic?

Fudge came back, accompanied by Tom the innkeeper. "Room eleven's free, Harry," said Fudge. "I think you'll be very comfortable just one thing, and I'm sure you'll understand… I don't want you wandering off into Muggle London, all right? Keep to Diagon Alley. And you're to be back here before dark each night. Sure you'll understand. Tom will be keeping an eye on you for me."

"Okay," said Harry slowly, "but why?"

"Don't want to lose you again, do we?" said Fudge with a hearty laugh. "No, no… best we know where you are… I mean…" Fudge cleared his throat loudly and picked up his pinstriped cloak.

"Well, I'll be off, plenty to do, you know…" **(AN: Ok that's the end of the chat.)**

"Thanks… Minister," And with a last smile and shake of Harry's hand, Fudge left the room. Tom now moved forward, beaming at Harry.

"If you'll follow me, Mr. Potter and bring your dog," he said, "I've already taken your things up…"

Harry followed Tom up a handsome wooden staircase to a door with a brass number eleven on it, which Tom unlocked and opened for him.

Inside was a very comfortable-looking bed, some highly polished oak furniture, and a cheerfully crackling fire. The dog bounded into the room and settled onto the rug in front of the fire. Also, perched on top of the wardrobe was —

"Hedwig!" Harry gasped.

The snowy owl clicked her beak and fluttered down onto Harry's arm.

"Very smart owl you've got there," chuckled Tom. "She arrived about five minutes after you did. If there's anything you need, Mr. Potter, don't hesitate to ask." He gave another bow and left.

Harry sat on his bed for a long time, absentmindedly stroking Hedwig. The sky outside the window was changing rapidly from deep, velvety blue to cold, steely gray and then, slowly, to pink shot with gold. Harry could hardly believe that he'd left Privet Drive only a few hours ago, that he wasn't expelled, and that he was now facing a month and a half completely Dursley-free.

"It's been a very weird night, Hedwig," he yawned. And without even removing his glasses, he slumped back onto his pillows and fell asleep.


	2. Diagon Alley & The Vault

Harry Potter and the Strange Twist

AN: REVAMPED CHAPTER!

Disclaimer: I do not own HP if I did why would I write fanfiction?

Chapter 2: Diagon Alley & The Vault

Harry woke the next morning feeling very refreshed. He got up with repressed excitement as he showered and dressed before heading down to the bar for breakfast. He couldn't believe his luck, a month and a half Dursley-free. Grabbing some bacon and eggs from Tom, along with a Daily Prophet, Harry sat down at a secluded table and ate his breakfast. Glancing at the front page he saw it was an article on the escaped convict Sirius Black.

_The Ministry of Magic has informed us that they are trying their best to apprehend Black as soon as possible. "We are using all resources available to us to capture Black before he can cause any real damage," said a Ministry insider late last night._

_The public is reminded that Black is a dangerous individual who murdered thirteen people with a single curse in the middle of a muggle suburb. The public is asked to please contact any ministry official of any sightings of the escapee. _

_For more information on Black's escape go to page 3_

_For Blacks alleged connections to You-Know-Who go to page 7_

Harry looked at the picture of the man. He had pale sallow skin, matted black hair, and eyes that were clouded with what looked like insanity. All in all he looked like a deranged vampire in Harry's opinion.

Glancing at a clock Harry decided to wander the Alley for a while, but before he could get up from the table an owl landed in front of him. Harry wondered who wanted to talk to him before he saw the Hogwarts Crest on the letter and quickly opened it up to see what it said.

_Dear Mr. Potter,_

_Your third year at Hogwarts is coming up and you must decide on what elective courses you will be taking so that we can have you enrolled in the classes for the start of term. This letter includes a list of available electives for you to take. Please note that you may only take at the max three of the five classes listed._

_We await your owl._

_Sincerely,_

_M. McGonagall_

_Deputy Headmistress_

_P.S. Harry, I thought you would like to know that your Mother took Ancient Runes and Arithmacy for her electives and your father chose Care of Magical Creatures and Divination for his. I know that you don't know much about them and I am sorry about that so I figured you would like to take some of the classes that they did._

_Sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

Harry stared at the letter as emotions flashed across his face. Boredom, excitement, surprise, sadness, and happiness flashed across his face so fast you would have missed it if you weren't paying attention. Wiping his eyes quickly, and wondering why Professor McGonagall was suddenly so nice, Harry scanned the list of available subjects.

_This is the list of available subjects. Following them is their level of difficulty for an average student. Difficulty is counted in the number of stars ranging from one to five._

_Muggle Studies - *_

_Ancient Runes- ***_

_Arithmacy- ****_

_Care of Magical Creatures- ***_

_Divination- *_

Harry looked at the list already knowing what his friends were going to pick. Ron would take the easy classes, Divination and Muggle Studies, or because his dad is so obsessed with Muggles he might just take Care of Magical Creatures instead. Hermione, of course, would find some way around the rule of only being able to take three of the five and would take them all just to prove that she was the best and could handle it.

This of course made Harry start to wonder why he was friends with these two. They were constantly bickering with each other and he was always stuck in the middle. Ron always wanted to laze around and play chess so Harry almost never got any work done while with him. Then Hermione always wanted to do nothing but work and would always be peering over his shoulder and making disapproving sounds if he didn't say exactly what the book said. Afterwards she would take his paper and cross out most of it saying it was wrong and get this superior look in her eye at the fact that she was better at it.

Then he thought how they were his first friends and he was mad at himself for thinking ill of them. Of course he couldn't forget what he thought, as it was all true, he just decided to ignore it for now. Maybe if he got more friends he could slowly drift away from them and it wouldn't seem like he was avoiding them on purpose.

'Wow' Harry mused, 'Looks like my inner Slytherin finally wants to come out and play. Hmm I wonder what repercussions this will have at school.' Deciding that it was time to go wandering Harry wrote a quick note to Professor McGonagall saying that he would take Ancient Runes and Care of Magical Creatures as electives. He decided that his dad only took Divination as a free-be class and he really hated Math, as he wasn't very good at it, so he wouldn't be taking Arithmacy. Then as he was raised by Muggles there was no point in taking Muggle Studies.

Waving at Tom as he left, and after sending away the owl back to Hogwarts, Harry exited out the back and tapped the bricks that allowed him entrance into Diagon Alley. The dog, who's name he still didn't know, bounded beside him down the road sticking his nose into things and sometimes coming out with a few scratches or with different colors on him. Harry laughed at himself that he was still amazed by this even after coming to Diagon Alley for two years now. Of course he never before has been able to wander where ever he willed.

Wandering down the alley passing shops with some of the most interesting things he had ever seen Harry wondered why Fudge even told him to not wander around Muggle London, it's not like he would want to after being in Diagon Alley. After peering into a Magical Creature shop and watching a few rabbits wrestle with each other, ones that couldn't be normal at all considering the smoke coming out their mouths, Harry decided to go to Gringotts and get some money to shop with.

Walking up the steps to the bank Harry couldn't help but admire the goblins crafting abilities. The building was made of marble and stood tall and proud. It was fantastic and Harry was mildly curios of how they built it. Walking into the lobby Harry glanced around at all the different goblins going about their normal business. The dog beside him was smirking slightly as it thought of what it did last night when it sneaked off, not that Harry knew that or saw as he was busy looking around.

Harry walked up to a free counter and waited for the goblin to notice him. After a few moments the goblin glanced at him strangely then said, "How may I help you?"

"I would like to make a withdrawal please."

The goblin looked a bit shocked at having been asked please. Nevertheless he said, "Name?"

"Harry Potter."

The goblin glanced at Harry's forehead then at a note on his desk. "Of course Mr. Potter I presume you have your key?"

"Yes sir its right here," said Harry holding up his key.

The goblin still had that mildly shocked look on its face from Harry being polite to him, like he never had a wizard be polite with him. The goblin then said, "Good then let me call your account manager so he can take you down to your vault."

The goblin then sent a nearby goblin to go get Harry's account manager. Harry didn't know that he was important enough to need an account manager so he would just ask when he showed up.

A few seconds later the goblin showed back up with another that Harry recognized. "Griphook! I didn't realize you were my account manager. Not that I knew I needed one but… oh well."

The goblins in hearing range stared at him. He remembered a goblin by name and appearance! It was almost unheard of for a wizard to do that, or even care. Griphook managed to compose himself. "Hello Mr. Potter, I am surprised that you remember me. Now we have some other business to attend to today that has to do with your vaults. If you want we can get that over with before we go about your regular business."

Harry didn't know what Griphook meant by vaults but decided to just go with it, after all it couldn't hurt him. "Sure thing Master Griphook lead the way, I can do my business later."

Harry didn't know this, not that he should, but this also shocked the goblins. Griphook nodded mutely then lead Harry down a side hall to his office. After Harry settled into a comfortable chair Griphook pulled a few papers to him then addressed Harry, "Mr. Potter, I noticed that you have only been going to your Trust Vault since you were reintroduced into the wizarding world. I was wondering why this was seeing as your parents left you a number of things to pursue inside the Potter Family Vault. Also you have not been replying to your quarterly updates on your vaults since your eleventh birthday. Would you care to explain?"

Harry sat in shock for a moment. He had more then one vault? His parents left him things besides money? He was supposed to be getting updates about his vaults? Emotions flickered on his face ranging from surprised to saddened to excited to confused and finally to anger. "Master Griphook," Harry spoke in a controlled neutral tone, "I have never known about any other vaults except for the one I access every summer for school supplies. Also I have never gotten anything from my parents except the money that I know about, and I have never received a report about my vaults from Gringotts. Could you please explain this to me?"

Griphook got this nasty grin on his face, a grin that promised pain and suffering for the one that had wronged Gringotts. Griphook had discovered something that could get him a very large bonus. After all, Fraud of an Ancient and Noble House is a crime in both the Wizenagemot and Gringotts. "Mr. Potter I did not know but if you will give me a minute I am sure I can get records of your parents will, your bank statement, and copies of all the letters sent to you since your eleventh birthday."

Harry nodded mutely absentmindedly scratching behind the dogs ears as he thought. 'My parents had a will and I've heard nothing of it in the two years I've been in magical Britain? That just seems fishy. Also I never got what my parents left me except what I was told about. And I haven't been getting my bank statements so I know how much money I have left. This is just too weird to be a coincidence.'

Harry's train of thought was interrupted when Griphook walked back in with a stack of papers. "Here you go Mr. Potter a copy of all your bank statements, a copy of all our letters, and this." He grabbed the bottom most sheet and laid it in the middle of his desk. He then tapped it with the end of his long finger and said something in a language Harry didn't understand.

As soon as Griphook spoke the words two figures popped out of the paper. One was a woman. She had vibrant red hair that draped over her shoulders and brilliant green eyes. The other was a man. He had black hair that stuck up in all sorts of odd places and hazel eyes behind wire rimmed glasses. It was his parents. Then his dad spoke, "This is our last will and testament. I, James Potter, leave all that I own to my son, Harry James Potter with the hope that he will grow up happy and play pranks on all that deserve it. Also I leave him a few things to help him on the way that shall be sealed in the Potter Family Vault which he will be allowed access to as soon as he learns about it." He then backed up and Harry's mom stepped forward. "I, Lily Potter nee Evans, leave all that I own to my son, Harry James Potter with the hope that he won't be as clueless as his father and will actually try in his studies. I also leave him my notes and handwritten books on Charms and Ancient Runes to be sealed in the Potter Family Vault for when he needs them." Harry's Dad then stepped up beside her and wrapped his arm around her before they both spoke, "We also leave custody of our son until the time he can take care of himself to the following people in the order that they are listed. First, he is to be taken in by Sirius Black if he is able since he is Harry's Godfather. If Sirius is unable then he is to go to his Godmother Alice Longbottom. If not then he shall go to Remus Lupin. If Remus is unable to take care of him then he shall go to Filius Flitwick. If Professor Flitwick is unable then he is to go to Minerva McGonagall. He is not to go to the Dursleys WHATSOEVER! If this will has not been followed then he is to be emancipated immediately. We love you Harry, stay safe and do us proud."

Harry cried softly to himself as his parents figures faded back into the magical parchment. Composing himself Harry asked, "Can we get this settled today?"

"Of course Mr. Potter"

Griphook then took a dark colored quill and a few sheets of parchment and pointed at the end that had a signing line. "Just sign here Mr. Potter and you will be emancipated. This means that you are legally an adult and can do magic whenever you wish, and you are able to make your own decisions on where you live. All you have to do is sign."

Harry grabbed the pen and signed his name. The ink was red and it took him a second to realize the pain in the back of his hand. "Ah yes this is a Blood Quill Mr. Potter. It uses your blood as ink. It is necessary to ensure you are who you say you are."

Nodding Harry pushed the parchment over to Griphook. "May we go to the Potter Family Vaults Master Griphook? I wish to see what my parents left me," Harry said in a slightly subdued tone. Griphook, realizing the importance of family as it was even more precious then gold in the Goblin Nation, nodded and led Harry and the dog back to the lobby. Once there he asked a nearby goblin to get him a pair of clankers. Once the goblin returned with a sack full of something that was making clanking sounds, they set off down the usual corridor to the carts. Griphook motioned him into one of the carts. The dog jumped in behind him and settled between his legs. Then they set off down the tracks. It took a lot longer then usual but finally they stopped after going through a small waterfall.

Griphook took out a metal thing from the sack that clanked against it to make a loud ringing noise. They then rounded the corner and Harry saw why it was needed. Standing in the middle of the corridor was a dragon. It backed away slowly at the noise and they walked down a little ways and stopped in front of a big oak door. Pushing on it slightly Harry was surprised that it opened so easily, seeing as it was a very big door.

Once inside Harry saw mounds of small bronze Knuts, shining silver Sickles, and glinting gold Galleons. Along one wall was a huge bookshelf filled with books. On a dais in front of the bookshelf was what looked like a regular leather-bound notebook. Across from it on the other wall there were many paintings hanging on it, like at Hogwarts. The pictures moved and seemed to be asleep. On the wall across from the entrance there was a line of trunks and chest with a nameplate above each one saying what it was for and how many compartments it had.

Griphook stood at the door patiently while the dog ran around in the huge vault as if looking for something. Walking around the piles of money Harry found himself in front of the portraits. He saw that each one had a nameplate. At the end he saw what he was looking for, the names JAMES POTTER and LILY POTTER. After their portraits was an empty stretch, presumably for future portraits. Looking at the portraits he saw his parents. They looked to be about twenty or twenty-one. His mother was sitting sideways in a comfortable looking armchair. She was wearing a red t-shirt and a cheap looking necklace. Her vibrant red hair was framing her thin face as it spilled across her shoulders.

His father on the other hand was wearing his school uniform, minus the robes. His white button up shirt had its sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his tie was a little loose. His hair was as messy as always and his glasses had slid to the bottom of his nose barely hanging on. Harry smiled sadly at the portraits. The dog, who Harry hadn't noticed walking up behind him, barked loudly. It echoed in the vault and seemed to make the walls vibrate from its echo. Harry watched as his parents blearily woke up. First was his dad whose hazel eyes were still glazed over in sleep. He blearily pushed his glasses back into place and straightened up in his chair. His mom woke up in a much more dignified way. Her almond shaped green eyes opened and it seemed as if she was never asleep. She straitened immediately so that it looked like she had been that way the whole time he was here. They looked around for a second before noticing him and the dog. Lily let out a little gasp and James smirked slightly.

James said, "Padfoot? Is that you, you mangy mutt? Where you been the past 13 years? Me and Lils here thought you'd never show up. And look, that you Harry? Man you're all grown up. Why haven't you been in here before?"

Lily, who hadn't taken her eyes off of Harry, saw the sad look in Harry's eyes. "James, I think… I think were dead."

James, who was about to say more, looked at his wife in shock. Then he looked at Harry and saw the sad truth in his eyes. Sighing loudly James said, "That still doesn't explain why you haven't been in here in 13 years. Our will said that you had access to the vaults."

Harry, who had been staring at his parents still unable to believe that this was real, spoke up, "That's because I didn't know about them till today. You see, um… iwasraisedbythedursleys." Harry finished really fast so as to hope they didn't catch the last part.

James and Lily's eyes both darkened, "You what? Please tell me I didn't hear what I thought I just heard."

"Um… I was raised by the Dursleys."

James looked pissed beyond reason and Lily looked sad and furious at the same time. "Who put you with the Dursleys Harry?"

Harry glanced at Griphook, who had until this point been quiet, and asked the silent question. Griphook nodded at Harry slightly and walked into the vault next to him. "Mr. and Mrs. Potter, it is my sad duty to inform you that upon your deaths in Godrics Hollow on Halloween 1981 by the hands of Lord Voldemort, your son Harry James Potter was taken to the Dursleys of Nm. 4 Privet Drive, Surrey by Albus Dumbledore. Furthermore it was Albus Dumbledore that sealed your will by order of the Wizenagemot on November 1, 1981. Since then Harry James Potter has been living with said Dursleys until his birthday in 1991. As of then he was sent to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry until the summer of 1992 where he was returned to said Dursleys and has been staying with every summer since school began. He is currently residing at the Leaky Cauldron for the remainder of the summer since an incident on the first week of the Summer Holidays in which he lost control of his magic and blew up one Marge Dursley."

Harry, who only knew of where he was living and not who caused it, suddenly found his mind frozen while his parents yelled in anger and shock. Dumbledore. It was his fault Harry was stuck with those abusive assholes. It was Dumbledore that told him that he had to return there at the end of last year. It was Dumbledore that sealed his parents will so it couldn't be enacted. It all came back to Dumbledore. 'Why?' shouted a voice in his mind. 'Why did Dumbledore do this to me?' He was barely conscious of the conversation going on between Griphook and his parents. The dog, who had been listening in on the conversation, nuzzled his head into Harry's hand. Harry took comfort in it and scratched its ears.

Harry was dimly aware of Griphook walking back to the entrance of the vault. He finally broke out of his thoughts when his parents called his name. "Harry. We are so sorry you had to go live with my vile sister," said Lily, "But we would like it if you would come visit us again tomorrow. We think it would be good for you to clear your head before we talk. But before you go we would like you to go and grab the ring that is sitting on the pedestal in front of the chest in the back. It's the ring of the Most Ancient and Noble House of Potter. It will recognize you and make you Lord Potter. This will give you a seat on the Wizenagemot and make it easier for you to own your own place. Go ahead and get it and we'll talk to you tomorrow. Love you honey and I'll see you tomorrow."

Harry, his mind oddly blank, looked at his dad, who gave him a nod and a smile. Harry managed to smile back and then walked to the back of the vault. Sitting there on the pedestal was a ring. It was a simple gold band that was studded with tiny diamonds. Set on the top was a large ruby in the shape of a P. Harry slid it on his finger and there was a flash of white. Slowly Harry opened his eyes. He saw nothing different so didn't think nothing of it.

Harry waved to his parents and walked up to Griphook. "Master Griphook," Harry said still managing his polite tone even if his mind was blank, "Would it be possible for me to return tomorrow?"

"Of course Lord Potter. Follow me and I shall get you an escort back to the Leaky Cauldron."

Harry nodded mutely, not even registering his new title. He followed Griphook back into the cart and through the lobby. He didn't even register his escort as he walked back to his room in the Leaky Cauldron on autopilot. He got to his room and just lay on his bed. He didn't notice that the dog never followed him back. He didn't notice that he had a few physical changes thanks to the ring. He didn't notice that his magic felt more right. And he didn't notice that he was still fully dressed as he fell into blissful unconsciousness.

****Scene Break****

Meanwhile back at Gringotts there was a lot of planning, talking, yelling, and many other things going on. The dog had transformed into a man with wild black hair in grey clothing. He was still in the potter vaults along with Griphook and the portraits of Harry's parents. They talked about many things. Mainly what they were going to do about Harry's future. After a lot of arguing they finally agreed on what to do, but Lily still had some misgivings about it agreed that it would be good for Harry. So, after spending almost all night there, the man transformed back into a dog and followed Griphook out while Lily and James talked for a bit longer before cuddling up in Lily's portrait and going to sleep.

AN: ok there you go the second revised chapter. I am keeping the original story up until I cover everything that went on in the original chapters with the revised ones then I will remove the ones that have been redone fully. I did a lot of things with this chapter and hope you enjoy it. Have a nice day.


	3. Animaguses and Occlumency

AN: Thanks for the reviews people and keep giving me suggestions. I need them. If you see something you might like added review. Here are the responses to the reviews.

Reviews- Vegitunks1- I like the first one but am not so hot on the second one. I really like her with Remus.

Vellouette- I like all three pairings and will probably go with the third one or a surprise person that is in Harry's year.

Alex- I have also thought that pairing was interesting and might try it. I also have a hard time writing with people not mentioned much in canon. Damn Mary/Sue traps.

Peruser- the first one is interesting and I might go with it. I also like the second pairing as well, I might be more inclined to write the second one because I have had several request for that pairing

Disclaimer- I don't own Harry Potter, if I did I would make the Twins weasel animaguses and have them be prank masters and declare a prank war against Sirius in Grimmuald Place over a bowl of spilt porridge. And Sirius would be a lazy cloud watching prankster with a fetish for apples.

~~~~~On With the Story~~~~~

Chapter 2-

Animaguses and Occlumency

Harry left _Gringots_ and made his way around _Diagon Alley_. He wandered around for a bit then decided to visit _Ollivander_'s to see about wand care. He wandered towards the store and went in. He was immediately hit with that old book-store like smell. The smell that's like polished wood mixed with parched paper and leather. He looked around at all the boxes sitting on the shelves. To him it looked like a muggle shoe store selling really thin shoes. Not seeing Ollivander nearby he rang the bell sitting on the counter and waited.

"Ah, Mr. Potter I wondered when I would be seeing you again. Well what can I help you with today?"

"I was wondering about proper wand care if you wouldn't mind giving me some tips."

Harry was soon overloaded with information about proper wand care and why it was important. Ollivander also had that damn twinkle in his eye that Dumbledore was famous, or infamous, for. After about a half hour Ollivander deemed him fit to take care of a wand and handed him a bottle of fine finish auto-repair polish. It soaked into the wand and fixed little imperfections and healed wear and tear from the wood of the wand. It also helped refresh the magical core to keep it in fine working order. It smelled like shoe polish for military boots, but it worked really well when he tried a bit so he went for it.

Harry also asked about a wand holster just in case. He remembered how he always had to dig his wand out of his robes and wanted to be able to access it quicker. Ollivander was only too happy to oblige and gave Harry a holster to put on his forearm that when you flicked your wrist it came down into your hand. It also had enchantments that made it invisible and kept it from being summoned away. Harry liked it so he paid Ollivander for the holster and the polish before leaving.

After _Ollivander's_ Harry went to the apothecaries to restock on potion supplies. Then he went for ice cream. After that he went to _Quality Quidditch Supplies_ to buy a Broom Care Servicing Kit. He then wondered around for a bit and visited some other shops.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

When he arrived back at the Leaky Cauldron, he slouched up to his room and flopped down on the bed. Deciding he needed something to do, he took the Marauders chest out and un-shrunk it. He grabbed the book about animaguses and opened it. He looked at the cover and read the authors names. _Messers Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs proudly present the Marauders Guide to Becoming an Animagus._ He stared at the authors names for a while then looked at the dog in the corner. He then went back to the book and read a few chapters. It detailed how to get into the meditative trance to find your form and what it felt like to the Marauders in their own trances. He looked up Padfoot's and saw that his animagus form was a big bearlike dog. He looked back at the Padfoot in the corner. Could they be the same? Brushing it off for now he decided to try and get into his own meditative stance. The book said to cast silencing charms around the area and try to find your magical core. Once you find your core you must enter into a meditative state to contact it. Once there it will show you your form.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

After doing what the book said Harry found himself in a clearing in the middle of a forest. The clearing was full of green grass that tickled your ankles as you walked through it. There were a few scattered patches of flowers and clovers. The trees looked relatively new and had thick full branches up at the top. He looked around and realized he was being watched. Peering into the trees he saw intense green eyes much like his own staring at him. The eyes blinked at him then a figure walked into the clearing. It was a sleek black cat. The muscles in its legs and body rippling as it moved. It had a natural grace about it. On its head was untamed looking hair. It had a white patch on its head that looked roughly like a lightning bolt. Its eyes were an intense piercing green, just like his. He was a panther animagus. The panther stalked towards him then sniffed. It seemed to like him because it then sat down and rubbed its head against his leg. Harry reached down and patted its head. The panther than stood up and put its paws on Harry's chest. There was a blinding white light then nothing.

Harry then found himself in a tall tower. The tower also looked relatively new with great brickwork. Its roof was flat with a stone staircase leading into the tower. The roof looked like one you would see on top of old medieval castles. Harry wandered to the edge and peered downward. There was a forest at the bottom that suspiciously looked like the one he was just in. He looked around for a bit and spotted the clearing he was in. It was empty. Wondering what he was doing here he tried to spot any living thing. Hearing a hoot he spun around. There in the middle of the roof was an owl. This owl was pitch black. Its feathers gleamed in the sunshine. The feathers on its head looked a little ruffled, like Harry's hair. It opened its eyes and Harry was suddenly staring back at his own eyes. Harry realized he had two animagus forms, but that was supposed to be impossible. McGonogal had said so last year in a particularly difficult lesson. Harry started when the bird flew onto his shoulder. It gave a playful nip on his ear, much like Hedwig does. There was another flash of light then Harry and the owl were gone.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

Harry woke up in his room and realized that a few hours had passed. Looking around he found the book sitting on the bed open to the page he had it on. He also saw Padfoot in the corner asleep. Grabbing the book he flipped through it looking for any hint as to why he has more than one form. After a half hour of searching he couldn't find anything so he flipped to what it said to do after your meditation. The book said:

_Now that you have seen your form it is time for you to work on becoming an animagus. First what you need to do is grab the book in the chest about Occlumency. Occlumency is a key part in being an animagus. It helps you sort through your thoughts and makes sure that too many of the traits of your form do not transfer into your human form. For example if you are a lion you will gain some characteristics of the lion. But if you don't have Occlumency you will also gain the aggressiveness of the lion. Also it will greatly speed up the time in which you gain your form._

Harry sat the book down and went to the trunk. He opened it and worked through the books till he got to the one on Occlumency. He opened it and saw that the author of this one was Prongs. He opened to the first page and got to reading:

_The secret to Occlumency is to picture your mind as a place you think is safe. Once you have your place you build walls around it to protect your mind. A good thing to do is to place memories and thoughts in categories. Once they are in categories you can then place them into a lock box or trunks or anything that locks. Then you reinforce these locked things with enchantments in your mind. A good way to protect your mind from attack is to split your consciousness into two and have half always in your head guarding it from attack. It will take up to a week to get your mind set up with the proper enchantment and protections. A list of enchantments that are helpful are below._

Harry sat for a while trying to decide what to envision his mind as. After coming to a decision about where he got to work. Sitting there he envisioned his mind as the tower and forest where he saw his animagus forms. On the inside of the tower he made it the Gryffindor colors with the furniture like the Gryffindor common room. He made the forest shaped like a labyrinth. He then started sorting through his memories. The only draw back to this is that you have to relive every last one of them. After going through part of his childhood he stopped for a rest. He realized why this takes so long. Reliving your memories was a tiring experience.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

Walking down the stairs to get some lunch he wondered how his friends were doing. Arriving at the bar he ordered some food and a butterbeer. Grabbing the newspaper he found himself a table and settled down for lunch, he then opened the newspaper and saw the Weasley family. Sputtering a little bit he read the article. He was happy. If anyone deserved a money prize it was the Weasley's. Cleaning up after himself he decided to see if he got any mail. Going over to Tom he asked if he had any. Tom handed him a letter from Hogwarts. Grabbing it Harry thanked Tom and went into the Alley. Opening the letter he saw that it was a sheet asking him what elective he wanted to take for the next few years and a full book list for all subjects. Writing a letter to McGonogal saying he would be taking Ancient Runes and Care of Magical Creatures. He sent it off and went book shopping. Walking to Flourish and Blotts to pick up his books Harry was hardly paying attention to where he was going. He ran into somebody and toppled over. Apologizing profusely Harry helped the person he ran over up. He realized it was not one but two somebody's. He helped them up and saw it was Susan Bones and Hannah Abbott. Susan smiled at him and waved off the apology. Hannah was flirting with him because that's just what she does. "Hey Harry how are you? And Why are you here, it's only two weeks into vacation?"

"Oh I blew up my aunt and ran for it. I've been here for about a half a week," Harry said sheepishly.

"You What" Susan screamed.

"I blew up my aunt like a balloon."

"….. Harry what are we going to do with you?"

"Oh I have a few ideas of what I would like to do with him," said Hannah with a devilish smirk.

"And what might they be? I have some things I'd like to do to you to Hannah, and I just so happen to have a room in the Leaky Cauldron where I'm staying. Want to join me?"

After watching them gape in shock for a moment he burst out laughing. Padfoot, who had been following them also let out a barking laugh. He asked, "What didn't think that I could flirt?" which brought them out of there stupor.

"No just didn't realize you could do it so openly" said Hannah with a grin.

"Yeah," agreed Susan. "Who's the dog?"

"This is Padfoot I found him when I ran away from my relative's house."

"Oh he's so cute," cooed Susan.

"I agree, so you ladies want to join me for some shopping. I need new clothes and was thinking of getting contacts. I have no sense of fashion and would really appreciate it, might even give you both an award. Besides, traveling around with two beautiful ladies such as you both will make me the envy of all the boys in the alley."

They blushed and squealed then started dragging him around the alley to various clothes shops and making him try on many different outfits. He tried on many different t-shirts, dress shirts, and casual shirts. He tried on so many jeans, dress pants, and shorts that his legs were chafing. He was even talked into trying on a pair of skinny jeans. All the while he flirted with the two girls. Padfoot sat snickering slightly the whole time. After buying more than a few outfits and a new pair of trainers they went to the magical contact place. There he talked to the guy about having enchantments put on the contacts. He had enchantments put on so that he could zoom in on certain things, see magical aura's, and see through stuff by thought. He tried out the enchantments to see if he could see the girls in the front. He looked through the wall and spotted them. He also saw through their clothes and got a nice view of some knickers. He blushed and tried to see if he could only see through the wall and not the clothes. He found out he could control the distance and amount it saw through. He went out and followed the girls to get some ice cream. There they flirted some more where Harry complemented Hannah and Susan on the matching knickers. They blushed and sputtered. He even described them to them. When they asked him how he knew he replied, 'Because I'm Harry Potter'. He paid for the ice cream then bid them farewell and got his school books from Flourish and Blotts about 3 hours later than when he planned on getting them.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

Arriving back at his room he dumped his books by his trunk and decided to sift through some more memories before bed. About two hours later he had went through all his childhood before his Hogwarts letter. He also went through all his memories at Diagon Alley. He had several trunks hidden throughout his forest labyrinth. He had them labeled and warded. He had one labeled Dursley's and one labeled Friends which was separated into compartments inside based upon what Hogwarts house they were in. Those compartments were then filled with a folder on each person. There was also a compartment in there for friends not in a Hogwarts house. The next Trunk was labeled Enemies. It was separated into compartments based upon level of threat, from almost none to RUN AWAY. The next few trunks were labeled based upon what subject it was at Hogwarts. He had one for each subject he took. He also placed a trunk for Ancient Runes even though he hadn't had a lesson yet. He had placed a trunk for the Marauders stuff he had in a room in the tower that was heavily guarded and was a prank room, because it seemed that the Marauders were first and foremost pranksters. One was labeled Adventures, which was separated on level of excitement. He had put all his adventures from Hogwarts in here. He had another labeled Hogwarts that has every other thing he has ever done or knows about Hogwarts. He kept his lessons near the front along with friends. He also had wondered around his labyrinth and placed pitfalls, faux walls, booby traps, ad several other surprises in there. He had learned from the book that you could place animals in there but they had to grow as your defenses got stronger. The book said you had to place an egg for the animal you want, where you want, and let it grow on its own. He already had the panther and owl from his animagus forms full grown in there. So he grabbed The Monster Book of Monsters that Hagrid had sent him the day before saying it would help. Hagrid had no idea how helpful it was. He placed an egg or two for each a few salamander, which were near a place in the forest labyrinth which had controlled fire; a couple of Hungarian Horntail dragons, which were completely tame to whom Harry wanted it to be toward; a Griffin, for his Hogwarts house; a few browtruckles, which had plenty of wood lice nearby; and a three headed dog, in remembrance of Fluffy.

Coming out of his mind Harry collapsed on the bed and fell instantly asleep.

~~~~~~~~Scene Break~~~~~~~~

Harry spent the next two and a half months wondering the alley with Padfoot. He visited the Quidditch shop everyday to stare at the new broom that had come out, the Firebolt. He also visited Griphook a few times to check on his accounts. He also finished his homework at the ice cream parlor with Mr. Floreane himself helping him with his essay on witch burnings. He ran into many of his Hogwarts friends and also flirted with Susan and Hannah when they came back. He also worked endlessly on his animagus transformation after he sufficiently mastered Occlumency. He had started on his panther form because it was the first one he saw. He had been able to transform all his limbs, he just needed to get the torso and head to have the complete transformation. He decided to talk to McGonogal about it. He was only going to show her the owl form though. He wanted to keep the panther form secret and he knew McGonogal would make him register his form. The day before he was to be sent back to Hogwarts he heard an argument on his way down the stairs. There at the bottom were Ron and Hermione. They were bickering over the half kneazel in Hermione's arms. He laughed at the fact that she thought it was just a cat. He ran down and greeted them before they could tear each others throats out. He then told them about his summer. When Hermione was going to scold him he pointed out that her cat, Crookshanks, was actually half kneazel. Hermione didn't believe him so he pulled out his monster book and showed her. After she got out of her shock she berated herself for not realizing it. Harry just laughed and wandered around the alley with them. After an enjoyable dinner where he hung out with the Weasley family he sorted the day's events away in his mind. He then practiced his transformation for a little while before going to sleep.

~~~~Scene Break~~~~

The whole gang arrived the next day at the platform in good spirits. After ditching the Weasley family to their farewells Harry climbed aboard and found an empty compartment where he was soon joined by Susan, Hannah, and to his surprise Daphne Greengrass. Daphne was a third year Slytherin who kept mostly to herself. She was disliked in her own house because she didn't follow the pure bloods rule all theme that fits to the house. She was also excluded because of her house so not many people were friends with her. Harry decided this was a good time to get another friend and maybe promote some house unity before Voldemort comes back. Harry wasn't a fool, he realized one way or another Voldie was gonna come back. He waited for the train to leave while finding out about Daphne and flirting with Susan and Hannah. When Ron and Hermione arrived, Ron started yelling at Daphne because she was a Slytherin. Harry really didn't want to put up with it so he yelled at Ron, "Just because she's a Slytherin doesn't mean she's a bad person. If you give her a chance she might surprise you. So calm your ass down and relax. If you are gonna keep yelling then do it somewhere else. I am gonna hang out with these girls because they're my friends. If you don't like it well then go somewhere else even though it would mean losing a friend I will not abandon someone because of their house. Ok?"

Ron just stared at him speechless, then sat down and kept his mouth shut. Harry nodded his thanks at him before going back to flirting with Hannah and Susan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~End~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AN: ok, hope you liked. Luna will be introduced in the next chapter. You can still give suggestions on pairings. Please review. Also I am looking for a Beta reader. If your interested pm me. THANKS. And remember NEVER TICKLE A SLEEPING DRAGON. ~sorry Draco you can still be tickled~


	4. The Train Ride and Feast

AN: Hey how you doing? So this is the next chapter. Sorry it took so long. I REALLY NEED A BETA READER. SOMEONE PM ME TO BE ONE OR RECOMMEND ONE TO ME PLEASE. Let's see some DEMENTORS XD. First review answers and a disclaimer

Vegitunks1- I'm glad you do and I want to know where that story is at, if you can find it can you pm me the name?

Vellouette- glad you like the animagus forms. I am going to put a little fluff and some time dating with the pairing you seem to not like, but it will eventually go to the pairing that doesn't have very many good stories on it. Hope you like it.

Peruser- No he doesn't but he will. Yes it is good but I didn't think about that. I am also happy about that last thing. I think its better when he does. And you are right about that for year 4.

Grey-Butterfly- I really can't write that pairing sorry. But you might like the pairing it will be. Glad you like the story

Disclaimer- I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER. If I did I would be a living in Jamaica enjoying a really early retirement and not writing fan fiction and bothering with school.

Chapter 3-

The Train Ride and Starting Feast

Harry was sitting across from Hannah flirting when the door to the compartment opened. Standing there was Draco Malfoy. He hadn't changed a bit. He still had sleeked black bleach blonde hair, and weird ass gray eyes. "Hello Potter, making friends with even more blood traitors. Look even got the reject from Slytherin. A compartment full of losers."

"Malfoy, you say one more word and I'll curse you."

"Prove it."

"Levicorpus"

Malfoy was suddenly pulled up by his ankles and hung upside down. "Now listen here Malfoy, I'm not going to put up with your shit this year. So back off or you'll regret it. And just to make sure I get my point across…" Harry then turned his hair red and gold, and transfigured his robes into a bikini and tossed him down the corridor into a group of Fourth years. Snickering slightly Harry closed the compartment doors and locked it.

"So where were we? Oh that's right," Harry then sat down and dragged Hannah and Susan into his lap. "This is where we were right?" he asked looking as innocent as possible.

Hannah just snickered and cuddled up closer, while Susan swatted him playfully on the arm and cuddled up too. Harry smirked over at Ron and mouthed, 'Get a move on with Hermione, you know you like her.' Ron blushed furiously and put his head down. Harry sighed and whispered something to Hannah and Susan. They both got these shit eating grins on their face. Susan hopped up and roughly grabbed Hermione, who gave an indignant 'Hey', then shoved her right into Ron's lap. Hannah then grabbed her wand and said, "Incarserous (sp?)" binding them together. Susan then plopped back down into Harry's lap. Daphne just sat snickering the whole time. Both Ron and Hermione where blushing madly. Hermione was struggling to get up which just made Ron more uncomfortable, if you catch my drift. Harry then spoke up, "If you would stop struggling the binding will be removed when its time to change into robes, so enjoy it."

They both glared at him and the girls but stopped struggling and just sighed. Harry laughed then went back to flirting with Hannah and Susan about how comfortable they seemed to be. Harry couldn't understand it but ever since he had gone to Gringots he had an unexplainable urge to be near the fairer sex. Shrugging it off, he settled in for the ride.

~~~Scene Break~~~

Harry woke with a jolt when the train suddenly stopped. Susan was already up and peering out into the corridor trying to see what was going on. Hannah was still in his lap clinging tightly to his shirt. He wrapped an arm around her and asked Susan what was going on. She turned around and said, "I don't know the train just stopped all of the sudden and the lights went out." Then the train jerked slightly and Susan tumbled into a seat and the door slammed shut. Next thing they knew there was a wave of cold. They all shivered and wondered what the hell was going on. Suddenly the compartment door slid open and Ginny and Neville tumbled in. Looking around they sat down in the empty seats. Ginny seemed to be glaring at Hannah but Harry wasn't paying attention. He was looking out the door to the thing that had just appeared in the corridor. It seemed to be floating. It glided towards their compartment and stopped in the doorway. Harry couldn't see what was under its hood, and wasn't sure he wanted to. Everyone suddenly froze in their seats when it took in a breath that seemed to suck in more than just air. Harry started sweating slightly and heard a faint yelling in the back of his head. Suddenly there was a glowing silver thing charging down the corridor that scared off the thing in the doorway. Still feeling slightly light headed Harry barely noticed a man coming into the compartment and asking if everyone was alright. Harry cleared his head slightly and looked up at the man. He had short dirty blonde hair that was run through with grey. He was wearing shabby robes and looked more than worse for the wear, but Harry couldn't shake off the feeling that he knew this man from somewhere. Dipping into his memories quickly he skimmed through his childhood when he caught some things that weren't in there before. There were memories of a quaint little two story house in a small little town. Not knowing what these were Harry started looking at them and realized they were memories of when his parents were alive. Harry let out a gasp and looked up at the man. He was looking at Harry peculiarly. Tilting his head back slightly he asked, "What is it, Harry?"

Harry just stared at him for a little bit before saying, "Uncle Moony?"

There was a long silence in which everyone was just staring between the two. The man, called Moony it seemed just looked shocked at Harry. He didn't know that Harry had any memories left of his life before the Dursley's. Letting a small grin he nodded at Harry and said, "Yes. But my name is Remus." Harry gave an inarticulate cry and gently put Hannah into the seat before springing up and jumping onto Remus and bear hugging him. Everyone was shocked at this, Harry usually shied away from physical contact and he was always stiff in hugs. Like he didn't know how what it felt like to be hugged. They had brushed it off but realized there could be a deeper meaning to it. Know seeing him jump up and hug a stranger, to them, was just too weird. And did Harry call him Uncle Moony?

"I can't believe it." Harry said.

"Me either, I didn't know that you remembered me."

Harry pulled out of the hug and looked at the rug ashamedly, "I dint but you looked familiar and it triggered memories of the time before I was at the Dursley's. I remember now but I didn't before."

"It's ok Harry. Anyway is everyone alright?" he asked lightly. After hearing no negative answers he passed out chocolate and said, "Eat it'll make you feel better." He then left to talk to the driver.

Looking around the compartment Harry saw everyone was looking at him strangely. "What, I haven't seen him since I was a little older than one."

"Yeah we got that just didn't know you had family besides those Dursley's you seem to hate for some reason."

"Yeah well…. That thing that came into the compartment, what was it?"

Seeing that he didn't want to talk about the Dursley's, Hannah spoke up, "It was a dementor, one of the guards of Azkaban."

"Oh. Did anyone else feel really cold and unhappy? And who screamed?"

"I did and no one screamed Harry," Said Hermione.

"But I heard screaming. Hmm I wonder?" Harry then sat down and zoned out. Not knowing what to do they just sit and stare at him. After a few minutes he still hadn't moved but his expression kept changing. Hannah who was sitting beside him realized that he was in his mind flitting through his memories. She didn't know he studied Occlumency. Shaking him a bit she asked, "Harry you ok?"

Harry jerked a bit then looked around. Realizing they were all staring at him he apologized and explained that he was going over his memories of the event. He said that the screaming was from a memory that the dementor had brought to the front of his mind but wouldn't say anymore. Leaving it at that, they settled in for the rest of the ride.

~~~Scene Break~~~

Arriving at the station they all grabbed their luggage and hauled it onto the platform. Leaving it there, knowing it would be transported to their dormitories before they ever got to the castle, they walked to the self pulling carriages that would take them to the school. Harry stopped short as they got close to the carriages. He saw what looked like a dead horse with really waxy, white green skin that seemed to be see-thru and stretch across its bones. Its eyes were milky white with no pupil. Harry nudged the others and asked, "Can anyone else see the things pulling the carriages?"

Everyone but Neville looked at him like he was crazy but Neville spoke up and said, "I can."

"Good because I thought I was going crazy."

"Oh you're not going crazy I can see them as well. You're no crazier than I am," said a dreamy voice from over to the right. They turned to see a girl. She looked to be around 12 years old and had stringy blonde hair. She was wearing Her Hogwarts robes with some strange accessories. She was wearing radish earrings, a necklace made of butterbeer corks, and a bracelet with charms that looked like rabbits with strange horns growing out of their heads. All in all it was a strange combination, but attractive in its own sort of way.

"Hello Luna how was your summer?" said Ginny while trying to fight back laughter at the look on Ron's face.

"It was good, and yours?"

"Enjoyable but boring."

"To bad," she then turned to Harry and said, "You seem to have an infestation of nargles in your head."

"An infestation of what?" asked Harry in a slightly scared voice.

"Nargles. They are tiny little gnome like creatures that swarm around guys heads when they start getting sexual thought of the fairer sex." Harry blushed madly and everyone present was staring at him. Luna seemed unfazed and just continued, "For example yours seem to be coming from Susan, Hannah and, strangely enough, me." She just smiled at him. He got so red he made Ron's hair look white. Then he paled. Ron, being the emotional twit that he was, saw this and wondered what was wrong. Then he saw the looks he was getting from Hermione, Ginny, Susan, and Hannah. Ron backed of a bit, and when Harry looked at him for help he just mouthed, 'Sorry mate'. Harry decided it was best to disappear and set off at a dead sprint toward the castle. He was gone before anyone could blink. Looking around for him they heard Luna say, "Hmm he seemed the nargles are still following him. I wonder who he'll admit it to first. Anyway he went that way," and she pointed towards the castle. Sighing they all piled into the carriage.

~~~Scene Break~~~

Arriving at the castle, Harry saw he had beat all of the carriages. Panting slightly he walked into the entry hall and headed for the great hall for the feast. He stopped short when someone called out his name. Turning he saw professor McGonogal calling him over. Walking over to her he wondered what she wanted. "Mr. Potter, would you care to explain why you are here before any of the carriages are expected to arrive?"

"I had to run from homicidal females after a girl called Luna talked about how I had nargles surrounding my head."

"And just what are nargles Mr. Potter?"

"Um… Luna said that they are tiny little gnome like creatures that swarm around guys heads when they start getting sexual thought of the fairer sex."

"Oh… well then it seems to be okay then. Next time please refrain from arriving to early and wait for a few carriages to come before entering."

"Thank you professor." He then started walking away before he remembered something that he wanted to ask her. "Wait professor McGonogal, can I ask you a question?"

"Yes. What is it Mr. Potter?"

"I was wondering if you remember any students that called themselves the Marauders."

"Oh yes I remember them. I was still teaching then. Quite a rambunctious group they were."

"Do you think you could tell me more about my parents, I know my dad was a marauder and would like to know more about them."

"I think we could arrange something. Come by my office this Saturday and we will have a talk. Have a nice feast Harry."

She then walked away. Harry was happy and barely realized she had used his name and not called him by his last name. Shrugging he walked into the great hall and sat down at the Gryffindor table waiting for the other students to arrive.

~~~Scene Break~~~

Arriving in the hall, Hermione, Susan, Hannah, and Ginny immediately started looking for Harry. Luna just walked off to the Ravenclaw table and sat down waiting for the feast. Neville and Ron were walking behind the girls feeling sorry for Harry for when the girls found him. They scanned the Gryffindor table but couldn't find him so they settled to wait until the feast was over.

Meanwhile, Harry had situated himself at the Hufflepuff table between Ernie and Justin, two Hufflepuffs in his year. He had asked them if he could sit here and hide. When they asked why he simply said, 'Hannah Susan Hermione and Ginny are trying to kill me.' Ernie, understanding what a mad Hannah was like, immediately agreed. So he was sitting there until it was time to leave. He was relieved when Susan and Hannah sat at the other end of the table. He had temporarily changed the colors of his robes so he looked like a Hufflepuff and put a few glamour's on. He now had shoulder length brown hair and light hazel eyes. He froze up when he heard Susan and Hannah asking Ernie who Harry was. He looked up to see them sitting across from him. They were staring intently at him. "He's Ash Le'Machrutte; He's a foreign exchange student from France."

At that moment Luna had decided to come and talk to Susan and Hannah. She looked at Ash and said, "Hmm he seems to be wearing glamour's. And he has a color changing charm on his robes. He also has an infestation of nargles."

"Really," said Hannah and Susan simultaneously. They whipped out their wands and canceled his charm and glamour's. He squeaked slightly then dived towards the Gryffindor table. They didn't have time to catch him so resolved to let Hermione and Ginny him.

He ended up with the Quidditch team far away from Hermione and Ginny. He talked with them for a while before the first years came in with McGonogal holding the sorting hat. She sat it down and it started singing:

_Good evening boys and girls, all the ladies and the gents,_

_I am the Hogwarts Sorting Hat, the Hat that's eloquent._

_I decide which Hogwarts House you really do belong in_

_As when you come and try me on I go looking through your noggin._

_Mayhap you'll be in Gryffindor, and have fine escapades,_

_Or end up in Ravenclaw and receive academic accolades._

_You could be a Hufflepuff, and wracked by indecision_

_Or perhaps you'll be in Slytherin, and so end up in prison._

_I decide where you ought to be, so sit down and close your eyes:_

_You have never met a Hat like me, so come and try me on for size._

_Gryffindors are brave but rash, and think that Quidditch is divine,_

_But they have such a narrow outlook and in class they come behind._

_For the average noble Gryffindor, all things are black and white_

_And also tend to be out of mind as soon as they're out of sight._

_Ravenclaws are intelligent and brilliantly academic_

_And feel that outside of their House stupidity is endemic._

_They tend to be averse to action – instead they are all vision,_

_And have yet to learn there is a difference between cleverness and wisdom._

_Hufflepuff, poor Hufflepuff, so steady and so loyal_

_Whose most distinctive characteristic is that they're unafraid of toil._

_Mind you, they have to be, they're such mediocre students –_

_Although this can be said for them, they always act with prudence._

_Last but not least there's Slytherin, unscrupulous and political,_

_Where intelligence and cunning are absolutely critical._

_Never turn your back on them, for they're infinitely ambitious,_

_And if there's Dark things' happening, their mere existence is suspicious._

_So now you know a little about the Houses where you'll go;_

_Just come along! Be Sorted! – It's inevitable, you know._

_And don't think that you can help decide in which House your life you'll spend;_

_Only Harry Potter managed that, and he was wrong in the end!_

_So just relax, don't worry, I swear it won't take long:_

_It will also be less painful than this endless, pointless song._

The hall was silent for a moment then Dumbledore burst out laughing. He started rolling around on the floor crying from laughing so hard. The Twins started applauding the hat and laughing as well. The head of houses were shocked silent. Harry had followed Dumbledore's lead and was laughing uncontrollably. The rest of the school was sitting in shocked silence. Once Dumbledore got his laughter under control he looked around the hall. He saw all the shocked looks and the silent outrage. Chuckling slightly he said, "Well, I've never heard a song as good as that. Thank you Gideon. Well on with the sorting."

~~~~~~~~The End~~~~~~~

AN: so how was it? I liked it but I'm biased as an author. Still need a beta reader. Sorry this one took so long to come out again. I had a busy weekend. Review please. Not one of my better chapters but o well. Laterz ya?


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